Don't you just love a similie.....

[mikebarhoot]

well thats just ‘dry as a popcorn fart’.

[steelworker]

Sore? Im stiffer than a wedding dick

[Matt]

These aren’t mine, random Reddit gems…

its warmer than two rats fucking in a wool sock in here!

my car runs like a striped-assed monkey.

[IH-GARY]

Shaking like a shitting dog

[Ross]

I remember watching an Episode of the Hairy Bikers a number of years ago where they described some sort of dessert they were making as "Smoother than an estate agent's brochure" and it's really tickled me ever since

[Brian]

my father in law would always say when asked how he was doing
flat out like a lizard drinking

[Matt]

[mclaincausey]

West Side Story vibes

[popvulture]

One of my faves was, if I recall correctly, Ron Wood talking about Rod Stewart being cheap.

"Rod's tight as two coats of paint."

[mclaincausey]

What’s a meta for?

“A simile is, like, a metaphor.”
—Stephen Wright

Just thought of a favorite from the literary realm, the opening line of Neuromancer by William Gibson (an Iron Heart fan, I should note):

“The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.”

(Not gonna fight anyone about the absence of “like/as”). Talk about a great noir opening that stands the test of time even as though its original intent is dated to a very specific, obsolete technology that younger readers may not understand.

[Sir_Cuffs-a-Lot]

As cool as the other side of the pillow

[popvulture]

@mclaincausey haha I don't think we're really pedants around here about anything other than denim

[mclaincausey]

@popvulture and even if we were, I’d still be right

https://homework.study.com/explanation/does-a-simile-have-to-use-like-or-as.html

[Tago Mago]

The dry delivery makes it:

Highlight #7 at 40 seconds

[Matt]

@popvulture maybe just one pedant.

[Giles]

Spanish GP commentary.......

As angry as a mosquito in a mannequin store

[Giles]

"More cunning than a fox who is the professor of cunning at Oxford university" David Croft - Sky F1 commentator.....

[LewisStonehouse]

@Giles that ones originally from Blackadder

[Giles]

Plagiarism is the best…….